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The Greatest Vape Movies Never Made!

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The Greatest Vape Movies Never Made!

Our senses are crucial when it comes to enjoying a movie. The auditory anticipation when you know a ‘bang!’ is coming; the visual exertion of picking out the villain approaching in the darkness; the physical sensation of pain when you realise that Gerard Butler just seemed to give up making good movies after 300.

Realising the importance of our senses at the cinema, we’ve teamed up with Oxford University Professor author and neurogastronomist — Dr Charles Spence. We’ll be taking over Islington’s Everyman Screen on the Green cinema for two nights to show X-Men: Days of Future Past and Gravity. Dr Spence will guide you through not just watching the movies – but also feeling, smelling and tasting them too!

Greatest Vape Films Never MadeWe can promise more appealing flavours at the event than ‘Smoking Moss’.

To get you in the mood for this incredible sensory cinema event, we’ve put together our own list of… The Greatest Vaping Movies Never Made!

1) Eternal Sunshine of the Smokeless Mind

Tortured by the inability to get the smell of her ex-boyfriend’s tabs out of her clothes, Clementine sorts herself out a new wardrobe and then hits the vape shop. Gradually, all memories of her boyfriend’s grating overacting and odd resemblance to The Mask are erased as she embarks on a new and more pleasant Strawberry Mint lifestyle.

2) Planet of the Vapes

Charlton Heston crash-lands on a strange new planet. Once there, he discovers that there really isn’t as much pro-gun legislation as he’d like and nobody calls him Moses. As if that doesn’t throw him enough, in this technologically advanced new world, everybody seems to be vaping.

3) Clouding Atlas

A stellar cast take on a variety of roles, spanning five centuries. The action becomes confusing and largely unfollowable, but thankfully the edge is taken off this around 30 minutes in when you and the rest of the cinema begin experimenting to see who can produce the most impressive vape cloud. By 45 minutes in, the screen has been obscured and you’re able to block out the horror and get on your phones to order the book instead.

4) Terminator 2: Judgment Vape

‘I need your boots and your motorcycle’, says Arnie to one of the other customers in the vape shop.

‘Jog on, mate.’

And so concludes a curiously and disappointingly short instalment of the blockbuster franchise.

Greatest Vape Films Never MadeSadly, What’s Eating Gilbert Vape? proved to be as big a flop as the original movie it was based on.

5) The Empire Vapes Back

The adventure continues! Light-vapers at the ready as our hero nobly decides for reasons of plot progression not to pursue a romantic relationship with his own sister. This leaves her free instead to rescue her preferred beau from the fug of cigarette smoke in which he has been encased by the evil Tabba.

Got any more Vape Movies?

We’re not going to lie to you, coming up with vape movies has pleasantly whiled away some time in the office. At blu UK we’re all about sharing experiences, so we reckoned this is one that we shouldn’t keep to ourselves. Take a break from work, get on Twitter and Tweet us your own #VapeMovies suggestions!

Smoking moss photograph by Jeremy Keith and cinema photograph by Leo Hidalgo, both used under Creative Commons licence.

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